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Warning: reading this novel may make you more attractive and elevate your random luck by about 9.332%*
(* These statements have not been evaluated by any person of consequence!)
From the award winning author of ‘No Hope for Gomez!’ comes a collection of impossible tales. Permeating the cracks between the past and the present is the realm of Unspent Time; time that was allotted but never spent. This is where we find the stories that could have been true.
Read how to enter below.
Excerpt
Kiala really didn’t want to open her front door. There were no signs that anything was lurking around out there, but she knew she couldn’t be alone. Not on a day like today. She’d thought about sneaking a peek through the blinds, checking the tree line that marked the edge of the village, but realized it wouldn’t do her any good. Sooner or later she’d have to step out. There was little point in making it more difficult for herself.
She took the magic rod from its encasement by the door and tested it out. It was a heavily carved piece of petrified wood that had been handed down by the women of her family for generations. It had many splendid and remarkable properties but it was not, she knew for a fact, in any way magical. It could cast no spells, ward off no evil, and it enchanted exactly nothing. It wasn’t even magical in the way that sunsets and sunrises were said to be magical. It was just an odd looking branch that had beads and feathers and sharp bits stuck to it.
In any other situation, a girl wouldn’t be caught dead carrying around something so flamboyant and so obviously manufactured to look mysterious. As situations went, however, today’s really wasn’t like any other.
No, sir.
But the rod was surprisingly sturdy for its weight. It barely topped half a coin sack and that was the one thing Kiala appreciated about it. Her tiny frame wouldn’t carry a rod of similar proportions if it were made of actual wood. Not for long anyway. Not long enough to cut through the forest that separated the village from the edge of the world.
A deep breath, a hand on the door handle, then a quick, strong tug. Like ripping off a band-aid, she told herself.
What she found outside was bad. Of course it was. It was as bad as she had expected, and then a little worse. But what should a girl expect on the day she’d been chosen to die?
... continued in Unspent Time
How to enter:
For the launch of the new novel I decided to discount it to $0.99 for today (PC and eBook), give away some exclusive content, and raffle off two Kindles. All entrants will get:
Read how to enter below.
Excerpt
Kiala really didn’t want to open her front door. There were no signs that anything was lurking around out there, but she knew she couldn’t be alone. Not on a day like today. She’d thought about sneaking a peek through the blinds, checking the tree line that marked the edge of the village, but realized it wouldn’t do her any good. Sooner or later she’d have to step out. There was little point in making it more difficult for herself.
She took the magic rod from its encasement by the door and tested it out. It was a heavily carved piece of petrified wood that had been handed down by the women of her family for generations. It had many splendid and remarkable properties but it was not, she knew for a fact, in any way magical. It could cast no spells, ward off no evil, and it enchanted exactly nothing. It wasn’t even magical in the way that sunsets and sunrises were said to be magical. It was just an odd looking branch that had beads and feathers and sharp bits stuck to it.
In any other situation, a girl wouldn’t be caught dead carrying around something so flamboyant and so obviously manufactured to look mysterious. As situations went, however, today’s really wasn’t like any other.
No, sir.
But the rod was surprisingly sturdy for its weight. It barely topped half a coin sack and that was the one thing Kiala appreciated about it. Her tiny frame wouldn’t carry a rod of similar proportions if it were made of actual wood. Not for long anyway. Not long enough to cut through the forest that separated the village from the edge of the world.
A deep breath, a hand on the door handle, then a quick, strong tug. Like ripping off a band-aid, she told herself.
What she found outside was bad. Of course it was. It was as bad as she had expected, and then a little worse. But what should a girl expect on the day she’d been chosen to die?
... continued in Unspent Time
How to enter:
For the launch of the new novel I decided to discount it to $0.99 for today (PC and eBook), give away some exclusive content, and raffle off two Kindles. All entrants will get:
- An exclusive spin-off novelette (not available for purchase anywhere!)
- Making of Gomez: behind the scenes eBook
- Signature for their paperback or kindle edition
- Chance to win a Kindle Fire or a Kindle Touch
(Prizes can be traded for Amazon gift certificates if you already own them.)
Just email your receipt to nohopeforgomez@gmail.com to enter.
Each purchase counts, so stock up on birthday presents (for people you don't like that much, for instance) The discount ends today, but be sure to send the receipts no later than June 1st.
(Or order the books from any bookstore.)
Coupon code for today: ZB77D
And then get
by tweeting about your purchase:TweetSound bites from Unspent Time:
“I'm looking into my past lives. I'm convinced some of them still owe me money.”
“I'm very polite by nature, even the voices in my head let each other finish their sentences.”
“I didn’t actually want to do it,” Kiala told the boy. “The universe just kind of conspired to force me to make a fool of myself. It does that quite a lot, actually.”
“Sadly, my socks are like snowflakes, no two are exactly alike.”
Here's what reviewers had to say:
"A veritable page turner of nonstop laughs!" -- Reader Views
"An unputdownable read. a Coens Brothers' film in book form." -- BookReview.com
“Extremely witty and clever writing.” -- California Chronicle
"A Party for your Brain!" -- Warren Baxter
Bio:
Graham Parke is responsible for a number of technical publications and has recently patented a self-folding map. He has been described as both a humanitarian and a pathological liar. Convincing evidence to support either allegation has yet to be produced.
www.grahamparke.com
www.grahamparke.blogspot.com
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I want to thank Graham for stopping by on my blog today, it was great having ya! And how about we thank him for all this cool stuff, eh? *Thank You!*
Liliana, the post looks great, thanks for hosting.
ReplyDeleteNot a problem :)
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